Happy Single’s Day 光棍节 guāng gùn jiē (11/11) to all the single ladies and single lads out there! (Happy Armistice/Veterans Day to all the soldiers, too!)
祝所有单身的姑娘小伙子们光棍节快乐！（同样，也祝所有的战士们“老兵节”/“休战日”快乐！）
Today in China, we celebrate being single and the one predicament that all single people often find themselves in: being the third wheel in your friends’ relationships. Or the fifth wheel. Or even the seventh wheel!
在中国的这一天，我们为单身而庆祝，所有的单身汪们都经常陷入一种困境：那就是不经意地成为你众多情侣朋友中的电灯泡！
This year, we don’t want you to go out with your friends unprepared. We want you to be the best third wheel you can be.
今年，我们不想你毫无准备的和你的朋友们外出。我们想让你成为最称职的“电灯泡”，你行的！
Do you know how to say “third wheel” in Chinese?
你知道怎样用中文说”third wheel”吗？
电灯泡 diàn dēng pào – light bulb
That’s right! The transliterated version of “third wheel” is even better than the actual English phrase.
对了！将”third wheel”翻译成“电灯泡”要比直接从英文字面上翻译（第三只轮子）好一些，更接中国地气儿。
The reason it’s called ‘being a light bulb’ is because in an ideal dating situation, you have a nice, intimate setting where a couple can enjoy private conversations, etc…
被称为“电灯泡”的原因是当一对情侣正在享受完美而亲密的约会时，“电灯泡”也身处在亲密的约会环境中。
But instead, the couple can’t enjoy this moment because you’re hanging around… 💡 just like a light bulb, making everything too bright and too public to enjoy.
但是，情侣们并不享受这个时刻，因为你一直在周围，像一个灯泡照亮着每一个地方。
Like poor Prince Harry here – 就像可怜的亨利王子一样：
Step 1: Smile awkwardly
第一步：尴尬的微笑
The key to being a good third wheel is all in the smile. You know you’re taking the attention off the couple you’re with. Make it count.
做好一个电灯泡的关键在于微笑。你要知道你在转移在这对情侣身上的注意力。（让笑）发挥作用！
Step 2: The 6-inch rule
第二步：6英寸法则
Never get within six inches of the couple. This is their night. You’re just there to be by yourself. Take that extra six inches and relax.
永远不要在6英寸之内靠近一对情侣。这是属于他们的夜晚。你只是自己待在那。保持6英寸之外的距离并且放松自己。
Step 3: Don’t forget your cell phone
第三步：别忘了你的手机
This might be obvious, but you do not want to be stuck next to the couple without your cell phone. How else will you take out all your single aggression?
这是显而易见的，如果你不玩手机，你并不想被一旁的情侣刺痛内心不是吗？你还有其他东西对付单身攻击吗？
Step 4: Never share your dessert
第四步：不要分享你的餐后甜点
Under normal circumstances, you might be inclined to share your delicious ice cream… but NOT on this occassion. You must enjoy it all by yourself.
在正常情况下，你可能会倾向于分享你的美味冰淇淋…但不要在这种场合，你必须自己去享用它。
Step 5: Use the environment to your advantage
第五步：利用环境对你的优势
Your friends are taking an intimate time together? What do you do? Grab the first thing you see and give it a hug. You’ll thank us later.
你的朋友正在亲密时光吗？你做什么？抓住你第一眼看到的东西并给一个拥抱。你会感谢我们的。
Step 6: Bust a move
第六步：跳个舞
Don’t let anyone dance with you on the dance floor. This is your time to shine solo! Show off your shopping cart and your sprinkler in all of their glory!
不要让任何人和你在舞池里跳舞。这是你的闪耀独奏时间。在他们的得意洋洋中炫耀你的购物车和花洒。
Step 7: Re-evaluate your life
第七步：重新评估你的生活
What’s a huge advantage of having all this time to yourself? You get to really think things through. Take a few minutes and make some goals for the next week, the next month, the next year. The world is your oyster!
这段时间你自己有什么巨大的优势？你要弄清楚这些事。利用几分钟为下个星期、下个月、下一年定个目标。你便可以随心所欲了！
Bonus step: Bring an umbrella
终极步骤：带上雨伞
You don’t want the couple to get rained on or to get moonlight in their eyes. Pro bonus tip: also provide a single rose when needed.
你不想让情侣被雨淋湿或者只是欣赏月光。加分提示：同样准备一支玫瑰以备不时之需。
💡Happy Single’s Day to all Lightbulbs & Third Wheels!💡
祝所有的光棍儿们节日快乐！
Feel free to share this post with all your single friends out there… and enjoy your single life!
随时和你的单身朋友们分享这篇文章…享受你的单身生活吧!